We’re all imperfect. We know this.
We’re all struggling with something.
But so much of the time we don’t allow ourselves the opportunity to actually SEE what’s going on.
We don’t want to acknowledge the things that are actually causing the hurt.
We know it’s there.
It hurts, it causes us pain, it’s not going away.
When we start to glimpse at the things in our lives that are causing the pain we stop. We don’t want to see that. We don’t want to think that. So we quickly counter that. We quickly cover it up with a bandaid of happy thoughts.
But…I’m a good person. I shouldn’t think that way. I have so many blessings. I should just be happy.
But then the hurt keeps nudging you and reminding you that there’s something there.
It’s like you have a cut on your arm. It hurts. You know it’s there but you don’t want to deal with it right now, so you slap on a bandaid and keep going.
Except that cut really does need attention. It needs real care or it’s just going to get worse and create even more of a mess.
YOU are not the cut. You HAVE a cut. Look at it. Examine it. Then start treating it accordingly.
I used to struggle with this. I’d have a problem but I didn’t like looking at that part of me so I’d cover it. Mask it. Pretend it wasn’t there because I was ashamed I felt that way at all.
Sometimes we’re negative. We don’t realize we’re doing it because it just becomes a habit. It becomes part of our daily thoughts and language. One client struggled with her brother. She didn’t like her brother all that much. He bothered her. He annoyed her. He did things she didn’t understand or agree with. She’d tell him to go away. She’d walk away from him. She’d argue with him and roll her eyes when he spoke.
She didn’t feel good but she couldn’t quite pinpoint why until she was aware of just how often she was adding negativity into her life and how often she was negative, sometimes mean even towards her brother.
This was painful for her to see herself like this. She didn’t like it. She masked it, covered it, slapped that bandaid on and kept pretending she was fine. But she wasn’t fine. She knew she didn’t like that part about herself. She wanted to change but didn’t know how. So she kept going, masking, covering, ignoring, and pretending.
It wasn’t until she was willing to lift the “bandaid” and actually look at her thoughts, her life, her habits, and her actions that were creating the results for her. It’s painful sometimes but once you look, you can start to see what needs to change. Then the healing begins.
Pay attention to ALL the thoughts that cause you pain. Don’t slap a happy face on and pretend you’re all good. YOU are not your thoughts. You HAVE thoughts. You are THINKING thoughts but YOU are not your thoughts. Spend some time looking at them with curious, loving eyes.
You can’t treat something you refuse to acknowledge. You can’t treat something you aren’t willing to examine to see where to even begin. Spend some time this week allowing, noticing, and getting curious with all your thoughts.
If you need help, I’m here to help you! Set up a mini session and just talk to me. It’s free. No commitments, sales pitch, etc. Just me helping you look at what’s under the bandaid.